Suburban Outfitters Bring ‘High Class’ Style to Pro Wrestling Syndicate

Fred: Fred Richani here for The Sports Courier at Pro Wrestling Syndicate’s return to Rahway, joined by one of the hottest tag teams in pro wrestling right now, the Suburban Outfitters, Chris Dixon and Hash Brown. Hash, the last time I saw you, WrestleMania weekend, your boy was nowhere to be found. Where’d you find him?

Hash Brown: I believe he might have been outside or in the bathroom. I’m not too sure.

Chris Dixon: Normally, those are the two places I don’t go. I was watching. Didn’t care.

Fred: What brings you guys out?

Chris Dixon: As you can see, the people here are not the most stylish, not the most up-to-date and not the most in tune with the hipster stylings of today. They’re kind of stuck in 2003, as wrestling is usually about 10 years behind. We’re actually on time: 2013. As you can see, I’m First Class Chris Dixon, and that’s High Class Hash Brown. Look at the hipster cut right here. Look at the way he cuts that mustache.

Hash Brown: Myself, I kind of cut myself, but it’s OK. I’m not that emo.

Fred: But hasn’t the hipster deal been around since, like, 2006?

Chris Dixon: What on Earth? That’s like being hit by a meteorite.

Fred: I think you guys are getting a little too inside.

Hash Brown: Whatever that means. That’s what she said. We’re inside the building right now. We’re not outside.

Fred: What made you guys adopt the hipster style? No disrespect, guys, but it’s kind of 2006.

Chris Dixon: Not really. We’re doing the current style. It’s not skinny jeans for the sake of skinny jeans. It’s skinny jeans with different colors. We’re adding a little bit of flavor and freshness. We’re not only the Suburban Outfitters. We’re two normal guys making it big, and it’s gonna happen.

Fred: It definitely looks like it’s gonna happen, and one of the reasons is that you guys are students of the Pro Wrestling Syndicate school. What makes it so great compared to other schools out there?

Chris Dixon: You’re not going to get the attention or the star power that comes in to share their knowledge in such a generous and honest way. No egos, just hard work. As you can see from a lot of the talent that’s come out of the school in the last year or so, us included, we’re definitely gonna set the world on fire. We’re doing it in New Jersey right now, and we’re gonna branch out very shortly. You’re going to see us all over the world very soon.

Fred: Where can fans find you online?

Chris Dixon: You can find us at facebook.com/SuburbanOutfitters. Not Urban. We are Suburban.

Fred: And Twitter?

Hash Brown: Twitter. Why do we always have these awkward silences in our interviews? I’m never gonna change my handle now that I know what it is. It will always remain Hash, underscore, underscore, underscore, Brown. Three underscores, like the three count we’re always gonna get.

Fred: That’s all, folks.